Day 1 of my 31st Circuit Round the Sun

Yesterday I turned 30, and I’m trying to decide how I feel about that. Mostly I kind of feel like a monumental failure. Maybe everyone feels that way when they turn 30. I suspect it will actually turn out to be a rather nice age. I’m wondering if I’ll ever stop thinking that I’m 25, and if my inner sense of 25-ness and my other inner sense of “heavens to Betsy you’re old to have accomplished so little on your to-do list” will average out to be my accurate age. Obviously I know that 30 isn’t really all that old. But by now, I expected to be well-respected in my field, published, a mom, in a good job with a husband with a better job, in a pretty house, with a masters degree, and my shit together. And instead, here I am, with all of my feces in piece-eez.

Existential/post-quarter-life crisis aside, I had a really nice birthday. Got to see a beautiful Christmas show, had delicious cake and ice cream, and received some wonderful presents: an awesome literary chess set, a pretty brooch (is that spelled correctly? what a silly-looking word) for my coat, a typewriter necklace, adorable angels, and a Christmas tree! With a hat! Also, jury duty. But that’s not ’til Februrary, practically, so it’s like a delayed gratification sort of gift – only without the gratification.

I am 10,958 days old. That just sounds silly.


2 thoughts on “Day 1 of my 31st Circuit Round the Sun

  1. Happy belated birthday. May your days be full of Redenzis (or is it Redenzi for plural like cacti?)! I am glad to hear that it was a good one, all-in-all. Even though my 30th isn’t until next year, I am going through some of the same things right now. It is being brought on because of the recent job hunt. While I have accomplished some things I wanted to accomplish, I find my list is just getting longer because I find more things I want to do.

    In polar opposite of you, I am less of a 25-year-old and more of a 35-year-old. Part of me feels older and grumpy, while the other part of me feels the youthful urge to get my hands into everything. Grad school would be fun, but I think that it might have to wait until the career is more firmly cemented in place. It is hard to go to school, support a family, and find time to study things that might or might not interest me so that I can jump through the right hoops. I think that once I get into it I would really enjoy it, but the 35-year-old-cynic in me is winning out right now.

  2. I may have always been whatever-age-I-am-going-on-40, but I think in my own brain, I’m perpetually 22.

    So no, I don’t think that changes just because you turned 30. At least, it hasn’t for me, and I got nearly two years on ya ;p

    And for the record, originally? I expected to be a married lawyer by now. Just shows that we don’t *always* know what we really want. I’m happier where I am, so hopefully that means that the detours are for the good 🙂

    …I still fully intend to do some more world traveling, however.

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