Three weeks ago (wooly carp, was that really only three weeks ago?) I wrote a weekly prenatal update and included a handy-dandy diagram I’d found that not only showed Kermie’s development in utero, but included some really boneheaded labels. After we all had a good laugh at the idea that BabyCenter didn’t think I knew where my own back was, I decided to look elsewhere for my illustrations.
Today marks Week 29, though, and a rudimentary GIS was less than inspiring. Since I happened to be sitting at a computer with Photoshop, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Behold, the new and improved BabyCenter diagram for a 29-week-old pregnancy:
I think they should definitely hire me, don’t you?
This week, if I had to describe how I feel in three words, they would probably be:
The first bullet point ought to be in flashing red text. I am So. Tired. I wake up daydreaming about taking naps. (This may be because while actually sleeping, I dream that my husband is the only one who can breastfeed our baby and that my sister wore a tutu to her wedding and didn’t tell me she was getting married until it was too late for me to buy a pretty dress.) I’m actually sleeping pretty well these past couple of weeks — knock on wood — but it’s just not enough anymore. And it’s become visible; as you can see, the eyes have it:
The second bullet point is mostly a teaching issue. I’m not, as a rule, a yeller, threatener, discipline referral writer, etc.. This year, though, the combination of “classroom management challenges” (that’s code for “bratty kids”) and my general feeling of exhaustion and discomfort has really begun to turn me into something that I’m not. Yesterday, I told a fellow teacher that I probably really shouldn’t be here anymore; I simply don’t have the patience that I need to survive my freshmen. I’ve caught myself being irrationally sharp outside of the classroom, too. I don’t suppose it’s really any more fun, but I kind of wish that these pregnancy hormones made me weepy instead of cranky. At least then people might feel sorry for me instead of thinking I’m the Wicked Witch! To tell the truth, if I could still be paid for it, I might be looking to bail out on work now.*
Bullet point #3 refers to the fact that my belly has finally become conspicuous — not in terms of the way it looks, but rather how it feels. When I sit up straight or lean forward, my belly rests on the top of my legs; that’s a peculiar sensation, especially when said belly is engaging in autonomous motion! My default sitting position has always been to cross one leg over the other (I suppose a bit as if I needed to use the restroom) but this has become increasingly strange-feeling, as my belly gets wedged up against my hip joint. Kermie seems to get cramped in this position and will often tickle my hip socket until I move.
After a few days of taking it easy (and making his mommy neurotic) Kermie has gotten wiggly again. Last night I was lying on my back, fully clothed, for a few minutes (I’m glad this is still comfortable, as it makes tired backs happy) and was able to watch — not feel — Kermie bouncing around in there. I’d been led to believe that mobility would begin to decrease, but I think he is still flipping quite a bit — and pretty quickly. Yesterday I clearly felt him kicking to the side, and only a moment later he was kicking at the top of the uterus, and only a few moments later he was definitely kicking the bladder/cervix region.
Killer indigestion. Achy stretchy hips/pelvis. Short of breath. Happy, though, except when I’m losing my poo at my freshmen.
Tomorrow is the Electric Kool-Aid Acid Gestational Diabetes Test. I’m not exactly jumping up and down for the fasting or the flat orange soda thing, but I’m cool with it. What I’m dreading — like, hardcore — is the drawing of the blood. They’re going to try to do it in the OB’s office, which means it won’t be a specifically-trained phlebotomist… and since a phleb couldn’t get a vein last time, I’m really not looking forward to that part of my day tomorrow (and of course, it’s going to be an A day at work)… but who knows. Maybe I’ll get lucky.
* So. Moms in Sweden get up to sixteen MONTHS of maternity leave at 80% pay (I get six weeks at 67% pay). Estonian moms get 18 months paid leave, starting up to 70 days before the due date. Moms in the UK are entitled to up to 39 weeks of paid maternity leave, and that may be going up to a full year. Lithuania and Slovenia, provides a full year at 100% pay. If I lived in Austria, Slovakia or the Czech Republic, the typical length of maternity leave is THREE YEARS. The chart I’m looking at has, as far as I can tell at a quick skim, only one country that has no nationally-mandated parental leave… that’s right, ladies and germs: The Good Ole U S of A.